3:00PM
Falwell Dies, Tinky Winky and Gays Everywhere Rejoice
Death is never a time to celebrate, but I think we should memorialize this recent passing by having a huge orgy!
LYNCHBURG, Va. - The Rev. Jerry Falwell, the television evangelist who founded the Moral Majority and used it to mold the religious right into a political force, died Tuesday shortly after being found unconscious in his office at Liberty University. He was 73."Sorry if my enthusiasm offends you, but remember, this is a man who said feminists, gays, lesbians, and the ACLU were partly responsible for 9/11 attacks on the World Trade Center.
His exact words...
"I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way—all of them who have tried to secularize America—I point the finger in their face and say you helped this happen."Falwell also...
- Supported racial segregation during the Civil Rights movement, saying, "I do question the sincerity of people like the Reverend Martin Luther King..."
- Supported the South African apartheid and opposed Nelson Mandela's release from prison.
- Called Ellen DeGeneres "Ellen Degenerate" when she announced she was a lesbian, and demanded that sponsors yank their advertising from her sitcom.
- Said "AIDS is the wrath of a just God against homosexuals."
- Announced the long-awaited "anti-christ" will be a Jewish man.
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