My Landlord Is Such a Tool
I started writing this post at 1:14 PM today:
About a week ago my landlord replaced the front door and the intercom system of the building in which I live. It was really nice of him to do, but also necessary because any hoodlum could open the front door by simply bumping it with their hip. (Handy when you forget your key; really unsafe at any other time.)
In order to do this, a worker had to cut holes in the hallway walls for wiring and tear out two door frames. Now, common sense would tell someone that after completing a project like this, you should probably sweep and mop the hallways and perhaps wipe down the railings because it's going to create a huge f*cking mess. But my landlord doesn't have common sense.
There's been an inch of dust on the railings, floors and in the corners of the staircase for over a week now. The place is filthy. I kept thinking someone was going to come over and clean it, but no one ever did. I called the butcher shop that my landlord owns on Saturday and asked someone to come clean. (In case you're new here, my landlord is a butcher.) My landlord wasn't there but the guy who answered the phone said he would send someone right over. Of course, no one ever showed up.
Today I called again and, this time, talked to my landlord directly. When I asked him if he could send someone over to clean, he said, "Oh, I thought we did that already." Um, no you didn't. Nice try. Then he said, "Well, I would send someone over to clean, but it's going to snow tomorrow..."
Listen, motherf*cker, I don't care if it's going to blizzard—SNOW DOESN'T CLEAN DRYWALL DUST and all the other sh*t that came out of the walls which is god knows what (I have to sign a piece of paper every year disclosing that I know the building could contain lead paint) because this building is over 100 years old. I mean, I feel like I live in the gd ghetto with this sh*t. I can't even put my dog down when I take her for a walk, I have to carry her up and down the stairs—and she needs the exercise.
And you know what kills me the most? For as long as I've lived here, every time I need something fixed, I have to call him three times. Every. Single. Time.
ME: Hi, Mike, the toilet's broken.
DOUCHEY LANDLORD: Okay, I'll send someone up.
No one comes.
ME: Hi, Mike, the toilet's broken.
DOUCHEY LANDLORD: Okay, I'll send someone up.
No one comes.
ME: Hi, Mike, the toilet's broken.
DOUCHEY LANDLORD: Ok, I'll send someone up.
Someone finally comes.
He ended up saying he was going to send someone over, so I expect I'll have to make another call tomorrow.
Surprise, surprise... it's 11:29 PM and NO ONE CAME.
I need to move.
Karyn at 1:14 PM
Reader Comments (6)
Don't let Bev walk up and down stairs too much. This is actually not good for her back. My yorkie Teddy suffered of backaches big time when he got older. Most yorkies have this issue. I know it looks cute when they jump up and down stairs, but as I said - no good for them...
Re the landlord. I had the same thing and I moved last february. And guess what, not all landlords are like this. There are actually good ones who care about their buildings. So, yup. Go ahead. Look for a new home.
Aarrrgghhhh. How frustrating.
Thank you, Jette! Bev can't go down the stairs--she's too stiff and simply can't do it. And I don't make her try. She can go up, however, and that doesn't seem to be hard on her. But I will watch her!
In all the years I've followed your blog, I've never "heard" you so angry. I feel your frustration though, we had the same issues with our property managers. We own our condo but share a foyer that our association is responsible for keeping clean etc. We walked around in the dark for months because they were incapable of sending someone to replace them. We would have done if our ceilings weren't so high and there's also the fact that that's what our association fee is for...
I feel like I live in the gd ghetto with this sh*t.
Where you live is not all that I lived their 2 summers ago.in the same area .What is the ghetto Karyn tell me please.
No, not shame on me. The ghetto is an area filled with rundown buildings owned by slumlords. That's why I feel like I live in the ghetto.
Also, learn how to spell and use punctuation.
Where you live is not all that. I lived there two summers ago. In the same area. What is the ghetto, Karyn? Tell me, please.
You forgot a period. It's "there" not "their." Spell out all numbers one through ten. "In the same area" is a fragment, but you can use it here to stress your point. Add a comma after "ghetto" and before "Karyn." You need a question mark. Add a comma after "tell me" and before "please."